As has been well-documented, we are more interested in what people do than in who they are.
It is much easier to explain what we do than who we are. It takes quite some time for another person to know who each of us is.
On the other hand, it seems to be quite easy for us to pin labels on others.
He’s the “funny” one. She’s the “kind lady.” He’s the “jock.” And, lately, she’s the “dumb blonde(!)” (I’ve been labeled the “smart” one!)
As we get to be known by these labels, the impression is created that “all” we are is what our labels say we are.
Of course, this impression is false, and the consequences of relating to people based on their labels can be quite hurtful.
Yet, all too often, we have a hand in creating our own labels.
PKD patients are vulnerable to the tactic of labeling themselves “diseased.”
This isn’t always done consciously.
When I first was diagnosed with kidney disease at age 16, I didn’t deny it consciously, but walking around as a college freshman taking diuretics, and hoping I could get through a class without the “urge,” and being vigilant for where the Men’s rooms were, well, it started to wear down some of my youthful “machismo.”
I had to face the fact: I had a disease, and I wasn’t quite like everyone else.
So, I labeled myself, “diseased.”
I took quite a while and inner struggle to accept who I was and to force myself to tap into the other aspects of my life that were quite normal!
I had to learn that I was not the only one that had an “inconvenient” aspect of life.
Some had academic difficulties. Some had difficult home situations. Some had financial problems. and on and on.
I learned to put my disease in a less prominent place in my self-evaluation. Over time, the label “diseased” just faded.
So, how do you “label” yourself? Does your “label” sell yourself short?
You are so much more than your “label!”
You may not be aware how your label might be limiting the way you experiencing your life!
Action step: Write out a self-description. Read it to someone you know and trust. Ask for feedback if what you wrote is how the other person experiences you.
A learning exercise if I do say so myself!
I wonder if you will really do this!
Who do I say I am?
A Child of God is very fortunate to have my faculties, and a kidney donated by my wife!
And, oh yeah — a Life Coach exploring the Inner Game of PKD!
Who do you say you are?
Let’s communicate!
Peace and Blessings!
Coach Richie Perl
Certified Professional Coach
Certified Trainer of Neuro-Linguistic Programming
I’ve been talking about this with people in my age group recently….most should be over the whole “label” concept. I think the whole world should be…but it still happens. It saddens me to no end.
If people ask who I am or what I do…I say “I’m me…and I just do the same thing everyone else is doing. Living.”