It isn’t what happens to you that matters. How you respond to what happens to you is what counts.
It follows that how you respond to having Polycystic Kidney Disease (PKD) makes a big difference on how you cope with its trials and tribulations.
As a PKD patient, you know that you are on a lifetime Odyssey. While on this Odyssey, you experience:
- Physical symptoms
- Lifestyle changes – diet, activities
- Changes in the nature of your relationships (family,friends, work, and community)
- Extra stress at the workplace
- Doctor visits and treatments which may be troublesome
- Financial issues
- Other “inconvenient” challenges
Coping with these experiences, for you, the PKD patient, is the main, overriding factor of your life.
The “Inner Game”
The “inner game” of PKD is your set of responses to the challenges you are facing. This includes the mental, emotional, and even physiological skills that you use which create the attitudes, perspectives, strategies, and motivations that you employ for those responses.
Now, quite honestly, this “inner game” is never “won,” because the “game” is never over.
However, these mental, emotional, physiological, and even language skills can be developed in such a way that you can be “winning” this “inner game.”
As you develop these skills and apply to them to your life as a PKD patient, you begin to notice that you are better able to cope with the challenges you face.
Playing the “inner game” in a winning way is like having a set of extra-strength “shock absorbers” to absorb the effects of the bumps on your Odyssey. The bumps are still there, but you experience a “smoother ride.”
So, what inner skills are needed to play the “inner game” in a winning way?
- Mental Flexibility – the ability to adapt to changing situations easily.
- A Sense of Adventure – see your Odyssey as the adventure of your life.
- Positive Expectancy – go through life expecting that you will experience the most positive outcome for YOU.
- Living in the Present – “The past is a canceled check, the future is a promissory note, the present is your wealth.”
Sounds great, right?
OK. I know that “developing these “inner game” skills while dealing with the challenges of my PKD is easier said than done.
But, what might be possible for you and the challenges you face, if you had help?
What If a Life Coach would support you?
As a Life Coach and PKD patient, I travel the PKD Odyssey as well. I will partner with you to help you develop and apply the skills you need to play the “inner game” in a winning way such that the PKD challenges become easier to handle. I’ve been able to develop those skills in my life, and I can coach you on how to develop them for yourself.
Typical challenges that we discuss are:
- Maintaining a positive relationship with your own body.
- Keeping a high level of self-esteem.
- Overcoming the sense of “victimhood.”
- Designing strategies to preserve positive relationships with family, friends, and co-workers while making new connections.
- Building rapport with medical professionals.
- Constructively expressing frustration.
- Working through the “should s” that may be ruling your life.
The Life Coaching Process
The process of Life Coaching mainly consists of your Coach asking you pointed questions, and you answering as best you can. Your answer will lead to further questions, In this dialog, you will move toward perceiving your “inner truth.” This “Inner Truth” consists of the core beliefs, rules, values, and internal structures that govern your life. If some of these “truths” are no longer helpful to you on your Odyssey, we will explore alternative viewpoints and devise action steps which will produce more positive results. Your “Inner Truth” will be your own.
Me: “What is the biggest impact of PKD on your life right now?”
You: “I seem to have less energy than I used to.”
Me: “How does having less energy affect you?”
You: “I come home from work and I’m too tired to handle the household chores.”
Me: “Household chores?”
You: “I usually “pick up a ‘few things” from the store on the way home, and cook dinner for my family.
Me: “Tell me, is it written in stone that you have to do both of those chores?
You: “No, but that’s the way we’ve always done it.
Me: “Do you think it might be time for a change in the way you’ve ‘always done it,’ since you are no longer the way you always were?”
You: “Yeah. Maybe it’s time to do things differently.”
And so on…
As you can see, this dialog will most likely lead to a new domestic “system” that will lighten the burden of the PKD patient.
Other Life Coaching techniques include “role-play” and “verbal journaling” (reflectively speaking what’s on your mind). I have many resources to draw from that you may find helpful.
The result of the Coaching Process is that you will have discovered, uncovered, and applied inner resources (such as “courage”) and outer resources (such as the internet) to make your Odyssey as smooth as it can be.
So reflect a moment on your current experience of PKD and your Odyssey.How are things working out? How is the experience affecting the quality of your life?
I ask you to consider having me partner with you as your Life Coach.Together, we will work out strategies and outcomes which will allow you to successfully work through many of the challenges that you face on the Odyssey of PKD, and start winning.
I’m looking forward to partnering with you!
Coach Richie Perl
Allow me invite you for a complimentary 25-minute “Discovery Session” during which we will discover the best way to smooth out the bumps you’re experiencing on your Odyssey. In this session, you learn how Coaching works, and learn if the Coaching Process and the Coach is right for you.
Also, please consider subscribing to this blog, “The Inner Game of PKD.”
When you do, I will send you my workbook,
“Goal Setting: 5 Steps To Developing a Well-Formed Outcome Statement.”
This workbook will guide you through the steps of formulating a goal in such a way that will provide you with a clear target on which to focus your efforts.
So, enter your name and e-mail in the boxes at the left, and get started on empowering your life!
Peace and Blessings!
Coach Richie Perl
Certified Professional Coach
Certified Trainer of Neuro-Linguistic Programming